by Ryan Vagabundo
Some people would consider it sacrilege to cook meat in a microwave. But if you're staying in hotels without a proper kitchen for an extended period, you do what you gotta do to get by.
I've done extensive experimenting with this, using different types of meat, and you can easily cook *acceptable* meat in the microwave. Within some limits. It's not gonna win any cook-off prizes, but it works pretty well for certain dishes.
All you really need is a microwave-safe plate, and some white non-recycled paper towels (optional) for convenience and improved moisture/flavor.
The big trick to cooking meat in the microwave is the timing. It's very easy to jump from "cooked well enough" to "dried out and/or burned" in a short period of time. Fearing "cold spots" and general undercooking, people tend to overdo it "to be safe" and then end up with a nasty overdone product when they open that little door.
Uneven cooking and cold spots are a real risk in microwaves, much more so than in a pan or oven, but the trick to dealing with that is to cook small separated chunks of meat rather than big hunks or patties. Think meatballs rather than burgers, or diced-up chicken rather than a whole breast. Also, avoid any bone-in stuff, as the bone heats much faster than anything else.
So we need to think about dishes that are tailored for small chunks of meat. Also, your end product for a microwave is gonna come out "OK" and not great, probably a little on the dry and flavorless side (it's essentially being boiled). So we want dishes with small chunks that are carried by flavor elsewhere, like cheese, spices or a good sauce. Spaghetti and meatballs, chicken and pasta, diced chicken that's been marinated in something in the fridge ahead of time. That sort of thing.
That does rule out some of the things people are probably really interested in, like burgers and steak. With the microwave you can't reproduce the "Maillard reaction" that gives pan-fried or grilled meat its sear and char and all that, and it's a real challenge to cook the bigger thick pieces evenly. If you REALLY need to make a microwave burger I'd consider making a "Juicy Lucy" - you basically make two really thin patties, put cheese and whatever veggies / maybe a dash of bread crumbs in the middle (to preserve natural juices), then shape the patties around them so all the good stuff is in the middle basically. I haven't tried one in the microwave yet but you can find tons of recipes online. If you try one let me know how it turns out, I'll post pics here if you'd like.
Ground beef, pork, turkey or sausage are the easiest to deal with by far. The cook time will probably vary by microwave, but I've tried a number now and for the standard cheapo hotel microwave you're looking at at least three minutes for small pieces or meatballs separated, maybe up to four minutes. I always do three minutes to start then add time as needed.
With chicken, solid pork or beef you're probably going to need to carry a special knife or kitchen shears to cut them up, unless you spend a little more to buy the pre-diced cubes (and if your store even has them). The only whole cut I'd try in a microwave is maybe a couple of those thin-sliced pork chops.
You mostly just need a microwave-safe plate for all this (I've been using these Nordic Ware plates, great so far), but some non-recycled paper towels (they won't have impurities that could leach into food) are a good and cheap addition to the process. I put two underneath the meat, just to save the microwave plate from sizzling grease damage (the one thing I worry about with even these good microwaveable plastics). I haven't had any issues with the paper towels getting superheated up to five minutes.
Another thing that helps with both even temperature and meat quality is soaking another paper towel and laying it over top of everything. This also dampens the smell while cooking and cooling. The flavor will come out fine, if a tad bland/dry, but sometimes you woudn't know from the smell. It doesn't produce an overpowering odor but if you're near the microwave, both beef and pork smell a little "off" when being cooked in this way. I thought Italian sausage might smell too powerful in the microwave, but it's actually mild and the most pleasant by far. Chicken doesn't really have an odor.
If you feel like the meat is coming out too flavorless, one trick is to add basic soy sauce to it during the cooking process, it subtly enhances the flavor of just about anything. It's easy to pick up little soy sauce packets at all sorts of restaurants to carry around for this purpose.
One advanced trick, if you have the carrying capacity for it (i.e. vehicle living), is to consider a microwave browning dish. These were very popular in the 80s when microwaves first came out and were billed as being for cooking everything, but fell off as people developed more specific uses and preferences for them. Corningware made the best ones from what I've heard, but you'll probably have to look for old ones used now. Amazon has an assortment of options including crisper pans and plates, all this stuff is in the price range of like $10 to $50.